so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
