Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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