I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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