Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
