When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
