Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
