I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
