so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
My ass is underappreciated
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize