I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
