Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
