UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
