Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
