are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
