I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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