Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
