that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
