All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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