I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I deserve this hangover.
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