im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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