don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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