Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
of course. lets lasso hookers.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
