Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
