We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
one might say we're banned from that church
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
