After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize