I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize