This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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