we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
