he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
