yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
