Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I wish I only lived at night.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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