so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
