rhymes with "ouble enetration"
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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