i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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