I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
