so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize