we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
You're like the curious george of whores
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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