Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Say something about gay babies.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Randomize
