people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I love having hate sex.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
