You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
