i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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