my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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