So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I want her autograph on my taint
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
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