Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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