office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
