Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
