About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Randomize
