yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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