Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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