Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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