That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
