Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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