i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
