I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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